Guilty as charged...

Being a mom is hard.  Being responsible for kids is hard.  Disciplining kids is hard.  Watching them make their own mistakes is hard.  Watching them deal with the consequences is hard.  Dealing with them dealing with the consequences of their own mistakes is hard.

Why can't they listen?  Why don't they understand that I've been through this all- I understand, and I KNOW how to fix it!  It may not be the way they think they should fix it, but life would be so much easier if they would do what I tell them!  I wish they could see into the future.  I wish they didn't have to make the same mistakes I made.  I want to raise great kids... Being a mom is HARD.

I want to be able to trust my kids, but I know there are so many surprises yet to come.  I want to believe they are perfect.  I want to think they are NEVER to blame for problems... but I've learned the hard way that it doesn't always work that way.

I wonder sometimes if my work has gotten in the way of raising my kids.  I work a lot.  They are responsible for themselves a lot.  They do really well most of the time, but I'm not there always when things go south.  I know, I shouldn't give myself a guilt trip, but it doesn't matter how often I tell myself, I still feel somewhat to blame when they make a bad choice.

So, what do I do?  Money, the necessary evil that it is, has been a priority since I got the job I have.  I love my job, but the hours are really bad.  I'm working when they are out of school, I'm working every weekend, I'm working every holiday- I've missed so much!  Things have to change somehow...